When it gets right down to it, many “so called” good acts slightly miss the old altruistic mark. Even when you think you are performing a pure, unselfish, philanthropic deed, often greed creeps in and there is a bit of selfishness involved. So when I heard that the subjects of an essay I submitted had been chosen for an award, I was justifiably proud … but probably for all the wrong reasons.

Ego can get you out of focus in any facet of your life. It can change your perspective. I think that is why the good Lord made it physically difficult to give one’s self a pat on the back. And while I enjoy a good pat on the belly after an especially fattening and fulfilling meal, it is hard to reach around and give myself a good back pat ... especially when, as in this case, someone else deserves the pat.

Last Friday I was a proud participant in an event that wasn’t about me at all. It didn’t have anything to do with writing skill or talent. I didn’t write the play or compose the music … I just had a part in choosing the cast.

As some of you may know, the Rosalynn Carter Institute at Georgia Southwestern State University recently solicited nominations for the Caregiver of the Year Award. I was fortunate enough to attend last year’s award dinner and it occurred to me that I might just have a nomination for this year’s recipient. So when the nomination process was announced, I started writing. I’ve been told that about eight hundred words is the “sweet spot” for an attention-holding newspaper column. I’m not sure about that. It is hard to stay at 800 words when you think you have something important to say, but I generally try to stay between 800 and 1,000 words.

And so, as I was zipping right along with a compelling story about some wonderful caregivers, I noticed that the essay would be limited to 500 words. Five hundred words! I could write more than 500 words about cow manure! It is really tough to put your heart and soul and talents into something that you feel is so important, and, at the same time, hold yourself to 500 words.

I have, however, had greater challenges. Once, an Atlanta radio station held a contest. The winner of an essay contest entitled, “Why I Want to be a Brave for a Day” would receive a great prize package that included two tickets to Braves spring practice, two tickets to Orlando on Delta, two tickets to Walt Disney World and two tickets to sit in the station’s box at a Braves home game. The only catch was that the essay was limited to five words! Try that a couple of times! It’s tough.

And so, while on this latest assignment I felt somewhat hampered by the 500-word limit; I started cutting and pasting with reckless abandon and finished just under the wire. I got the call that my nominees had been selected as the regional winners from the SoWeGa Care-Net in Albany. As regional winners, they will be considered for the statewide award and will be honored at a luncheon in Albany. At the luncheon, I will be asked to read my essay.

By the time you read this, the luncheon will have come and gone. Hopefully at that luncheon, I’ll be able to elaborate a bit and won’t be limited to 500 words in my praise of two dear people who have had a wonderful life, and who have shared that life with a very special daughter.

Sixty-six years ago, that daughter was born in Atlanta. Probably because of a botched 24-hour delivery and the resulting severe brain damage, this child and her parents’ lives were changed forever. When, many years ago, the family moved to Albany, there just wasn’t much help for “special needs” children or their parents. The result of that void was that the parents pitched in with other parents and they made fundamental changes for the better. Now Dougherty County can be proud of a caregiver system that might not have been so effective if it were not for the efforts of this child’s parents and many more like them.

For all these years her parents and her brother Bill have doted on Jeanie and made her life complete. She has seen the United States from a rented motor home and she’s spent many happy days at the beach. She has the undying love of her parents who are completely bewildered that anyone thinks they have done anything special. What would have been an incredible challenge for many of us has, in their eyes, been an incredible blessing from God.

That is why it is so meaningful for me that Bill and Florrie Whigham have been selected as the regional winners of the Caregiver of the Year Award from the Rosalynn Carter Institute. And even while I was trying to figure out a way to pat myself on the back, I know it is the Whighams who deserve the praise.

By the way, I didn’t win the Braves for a Day essay. I came in second. I got everything but the plane tickets and gave the other stuff away. I thought my Brave for a Day essay was pretty good for a man of many words who was limited to five: “I Always Got Picked Last.”

I’ll save the back patting for another occasion.

Boyce E. “Stick” Miller III lives and works in Americus.